A Little Humor: The Difference between Guts And Balls

 Yes, there is a big difference between “guts” and “balls.” 

Guts – Arriving home late, after a night out with the boys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: “Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?” 

Balls – Coming home late after a night out with the boys, smelling of perfume and beer, with lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the bottom and having the balls to say: “You’re next, chubby.” 

Although the definitions may differ, there is no difference in the outcome. 

Both will result in sure death. 

Note: The above photo is of actor Hal Smith, who portrayed Otis, the town drunk on The Andy Griffith Show.

A Little Humor: Getting The Sunday Newspaper

A drunk on a bender checked into a motel late one Saturday night. He woke up hung over badly. He opened his motel room door and saw a man walking by. He paid the man to go and buy him a bottle of whiskey and a Sunday newspaper. The man was gone for hours When he finally returned, the man said, “It must be difficult to buy a  bottle of whiskey in this town on Sunday.” “There was no trouble with the whiskey,” the man replied. “But it’s tough finding a Sunday  newspaper on a Tuesday." Note: The above photo is of actor Hal Smith, who portrayed Otis, the town drunk on The Andy  Griffith Show.