A man driving a car was swerving from side to side on the road at 2 am.
He was pulled over by a cop and the cop asked the clearly intoxicated man where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied in a slurred voice, “I’m on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking cigars and staying out late.”
The cop asked, “Really? Who’s giving that lecture at this time of night?”
The man replied, “That would be my wife.”
Note: The above photo is of W.C. Fields in the classic comedy film, The Bank Dick.