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Sunday, February 27, 2022
A Little Humor: In Response To Russia's Invasion Of Ukraine, Biden Announces He Will Move To Unfollow Putin On Twitter
The Babylon Bee offers a satirical piece on President Biden's response to Russia's invasion of Ukraine.
WASHINGTON, D.C.—After Putin led Russia in an unprovoked attack on Ukraine, Biden addressed the world and outlined the steps he'd take to stop Russia from rampaging through Eastern Europe.
"Listen, folks, I was hoping I wouldn't have to do this, today I directed my social media manager to unfollow Putin on Twitter," said Biden. "That Putin guy is a major internet influencer and we need to hit him where it hurts. We have no other choice. God have mercy on us."
Biden then directed his staff to "unfollow" President Putin on Twitter, warning that if Putin doesn't stop what he's doing, he will also "unfriend" him on Facebook.
"You want to have no friends, Vlad? 'Cause that's where you're headed, buddy! That's no fun! Trust me, I know! You'd better watch your step, bud!" Biden said angrily before tripping on the carpet of his house and faceplanting into his bronze bust of Neville Chamberlain.
Biden has promised to engage in further talks with world leaders once aides finish changing his Depends.
You can read other Babylon Bee humor pieces via the below link:
Paul Davis is a writer who covers crime. He has written extensively about organized crime, cybercrime, street crime, white collar crime, crime fiction, crime prevention, espionage and terrorism. His 'On Crime' column appears in the Washington Times and his 'Crime Beat' column appears here. He is also a regular contributor to Counterterrorism magazine and writes their online 'Threatcon' column. Paul Davis' crime fiction appears in American Crime Magazine. His work has also appeared in the Philadelphia Inquirer, the Philadelphia Daily News, Philadelphia Weekly and other publications. As a writer, he has attended police academy training, gone out on patrol with police officers, accompanied detectives as they worked cases, accompanied narcotics officers on drug raids, observed criminal court proceedings, visited jails and prisons, and covered street riots, mob wars and murder investigations. He has interviewed police commissioners and chiefs, FBI, DEA, HSI and other federal special agents, prosecutors, public officials, WWII UDT frogmen, Navy SEALs, Army Delta operators, Israeli commandos, military intelligence officers, Scotland Yard detectives, CIA officers, former KGB officers, film and TV actors, writers and producers, journalists, novelists and true crime authors, gamblers, outlaw bikers, and Cosa Nostra organized crime bosses. Paul Davis has been a student of crime since he was a 12-year-old aspiring writer growing up in South Philadelphia. He enlisted in the U.S. Navy when he was 17 in 1970. He served aboard the aircraft carrier U.S.S. Kitty Hawk during the Vietnam War and he later served two years aboard the Navy harbor tugboat U.S.S. Saugus at the U.S. floating nuclear submarine base at Holy Loch, Scotland. He went on to do security work as a Defense Department civilian while working part-time as a freelance writer. From 1991 to 2005 he was a producer and on-air host of "Inside Government," a public affairs interview radio program that aired Sundays on WPEN AM and WMGK FM in the Philadelphia area. You can read Paul Davis' crime columns, crime fiction, book reviews and news and feature articles on this website. You can read his full bio by clicking on the above photo. And you can contact Paul Davis at firstname.lastname@example.org