The Babylon Bee offers a satirical piece on the presidential candidates.
U.S.—Experts are predicting the winner of the 2020 election will be whichever candidate talks the least.
Analysis suggests whenever one of the candidates opens his mouth, his poll numbers plummet. This has led to a cunning race where both campaigns are desperately trying to get their candidate to just stop talking and do some damage control whenever their candidate manages to speak his mind.
"This obviously gives the advantage to Biden, since his aides don't let him out of the basement, and Trump runs his own Twitter account," said one analyst, "but don't count Trump out yet. Whenever Biden breaks out and starts saying something, anything, Trump rapidly gains on Biden."
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