A man at a bar became so drunk that he fell right off his stool and vomited all over his shirt.
Getting up, he said to the bartender: “Oh no, my wife will start a fight when I go home because now she'll know I drank too much.”
The bartender slipped a $10 bill into the man’s shirt pocket and said: “Just tell her that it was someone else who threw up on you and he apologized by giving you money for dry cleaning.”
The drunk smiled, had another drink, tipped the wise bartender, and left for home.
The drunk's wife met him at the door and saw his soiled shirt.
“You were at the bar again…” she yelled out.
The drunk held up his hand and said, “Yes, I did go to the bar and had just one beer when this disgraceful drunk vomited all over me. Check my shirt pocket. He apologized and gave me $10 for dry cleaning.”
The woman, somewhat suspicious, checked his pocket, and then said, “But there’s $20 in here.”
“That’s because he also pooped my pants,” the drunk said.
Note: The above photo is one of my favorite comics, W. C. Fields..